Labor Day

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

- from Akeelah and the Bee. The interesting thing I discovered is that although the quotation is attributed in the film to Nelson Mandela, it was actually written by inspirational guru Marianne Williamson.

Sunday I didn't end up having breakfast as was the plan. I used my coupon to get a haircut. I had a good conversation with my hairstylist about her kids and playing soccer. I then went to purchase some groceries and withdrawal money from the atm to pay my rent. I got a whopping balance of $17.12 now. How is that for motivation?


I was invited out jogging. This is something I need to do and I wanted to go, but right now I would just embarrass myself. I need to start training and then I can be that guy that is like, yeah I'll go jogging. Hopefully that training will start soon. Hiking was offered as the alternative which seemed really fun and I don't think I had ever done, but I had plans to see some bats so I took a raincheck. It was raining.



Due to rain the bats thing was canceled, so instead Ericka invited me to have dinner with Joselo and Monica. I joined and we went to Kirby Lane. Rick had taken me there before, but this was a different one. I had a conversation with an employee who had two piercings on her check bones. Ericka told me she just found out she had the same name as someone from my past. I think Monica put it best when she said, "It's a common name, get over it." The food was great and conversation with them is always so much fun. I like them all a lot, and I still can't figure out why I laugh with Ericka so much. Monica didn't like her meal, but the rest of us were very happy. Monica wanted fudge, so went on an adventure to find fudge. I can't wait till I'm pregnant and can have cravings. We ended up going to HEB. We rented a few movies. I recommended Akeelah and the Bee and Monica concurred, so we got that movie. We ended up seeing it first and it was such a good movie and it can be best described using Ebert's words "makes an uncommonly good movie, entertaining and actually inspirational, and with a few tears along the way." My big quote above is from the movie, I like it but I feel like I don't fully understand it yet, the quote I mean. Maybe I have this feeling that the meaning of life is summed up in a quote and it is my job to find it. Me and my magic pills.



I got a copy of Colbie's CD and have started listening to it. Her songs are short, lyrics wise, and it is not my type of music, but I still like it. It is catchy I think. I was going to use her lyrics as quotes in the future, but instead I'll just list the ones that caught my fancy here. Let's start with a part of the description of her cd..."but that is her appeal; she sings about simple, everyday things in an unassuming manner, letting her melodies and girl-next-door charm carry the day." I feel like I'm just posting her entire cd of lyrics now that I look at what I have collected, but I'll still post. And yes I know she is a singer that appeals to young women in their 20s (and from the concert I think a lot of sporty lesbians). I'm ok with that. The lyrics are not really that deep, but still touch a chord simple as they are.

If you just realize
What I just realized
That we'd be perfect for each other
And we'll never find another
Just realize
What I just realized
We'd never have to wonder
If we missed out on each other, now.
- Realize, Colbie Caillat

Oh I, I can't take it
So please please please won't you listen
To the troubles all around me, I'm caught up and I'm barely breathin
But I'm finding that holding on is harder than never leaving.
- Tied Down, Colbie Caillat

Cause this is a battle
And its your final last call
It was a trial, you made a mistake, we know
But why arent you sorry, why arent you sorry, why?
This can be better, you used to be happy, try!
- Battle, Colbie Caillat

Oh baby, if I was your lady
I would make you happy
I'm never gonna leave, never gonna leave
Oh baby, I will be your ladyI am going crazy for you
- Oxygen, Colbie Caillat

Back Up,Back up
take another chance
don't you mess up, mess up
I don't wanna lose you
wake up, wake up
this ain't just a thing that you
give up, give up
don't you say that I'd be better off,better off sitting by myself than wondering
if I'm better off, better off without you boy
- The Little Things, Colbie Caillat



I've got a midnight bottle gonna drink it down
A one way ticket takes me to the times we had before
When everything felt so right
If only for tonight I've got a midnight bottle gonna ease my pain
From all these feelings driving me insane
- Midnight Bottle, Colbie Caillat

Starts in my toes makes me crinkle my nose where ever it goes i always know that you make me smile please stay for a while now just take your time where ever you go
- Bubbly, Colbie Caillat

And I'm juggling all the thoughts in my head
I'm juggling and my fears on fire
But I'm listening as it evolves in my headI'm balancing on one fine wire....
- One Fine Wire, Colbie Caillat

I'm sorry it's taking me so long
To find out what I'm feeling
I wonder if it will come to me
- Feelings Show, Colbie Caillat

Is this the hook that brings you back as blues traveler would say? She has a good chorus for every one of her songs. I still think I might of gone a bit overboard on this one.

This portion of a letter I got reminds me so much of when Koki first met Mia and how she felt and how I was feeling about the crazy situation. I'm going to substitute my cats names in this story though since I am vain like that...but it isn't my story.

oh man, [koki] is NOT having this other cat. shes been acting like a cross between a king cobra and a panther.... half of the time shes hissing with her mouth open so wide im convinced she could swallow the other cat (who is more than 3 times her size) and the rest of the time shes growling like the panther in that janet jackson video. and seriously, the other cat, [mia], is trying so hard to make friends...shes practically stalking [koki]... its been really funny. i hope [koki] warms up to this cat soon...she doesn't seem to be making much progress though. shes acting like a 4lb bully.

I was very amused. My only advice is that I hear sometimes cats learn to tolerate each other. Some do become close, but that didn't happen for me in the least bit. I would say they are like an old couple, they don't like each other, but don't mind the company at times. I'm sure they will be best buds in no time.

confidence