Five Years Gone By

Veronica Alaniz Castro

“Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.” - Eskimo Proverb

Dear Sister,

Vero, it has been 5 years now since you left us and for me sometimes it feels like it still isn't real. A lot has happened over these years and I'm sure you have been not only keeping up, but a guardian angel for all of us you loved. This won't be a long letter, but one to let you know that I still think about you everyday, especially today. What scares me the most is that I'm not ready to lose another person I love considering how hard losing you has been. To think I might have to go through this many times through my life is scary at times. Grandpa is going to pass away soon. I don't say that because I have given up faith, but because of the condition he is in and his age. He was so close to 100, but he has lived a good, long and strong life. He can't talk to us anymore, but I had with him, what I did not have with you, a chance to say goodbye. A chance to wish him peace and find my peace. Let him know how much I love him and will miss him. I know that during your life you had to deal with the normal things I'm probably going through now. Bekkah is probably going through those types of teenage experiences now, and I'm sure you are giving her strength. She has your determination and people skills, so I try not to worry. Jamie doesn't know how much she is like you. You know I've still never been by the site of the accident. I just can't, it doesn't change anything that has already happened. I'm sure I don't want to go. You could visit me more in my dreams, but then again, maybe you can blame me for that huh? I'm trying to make you proud, trying to look out for our family like you did, but some days are harder than others. I hope you enjoyed the time with Eliza's little girl before she comes into our lives, another great blessing. Remember when you lent me your car to drive to a school dance. I had just got my license and did not know how to drive well and you still looked out for me and helped me out in any way you could. Thanks for being a great sister like that. It was a lesson I took to heart. Until my next prayer to God where I interupt my conversation to tell you about how things are going. (I'm sure He understands.) I miss you Veronica.

Love,

Your Brother

we would of been greater friends as we grew older