A Gift

"Regard illness as a gift, it can be such a powerful stimulus to change, perhaps the only thing that can force some people to resolve their deepest conflicts, successful patients often come to regard it as the greatest opportunity they have ever had for personal growth and development-truly a gift." - Dr. Andrew Weil. (Today's quote brought to you by Maria M.)

I got a comment on my blog, two even! That really made my day. It just cheers me up to know that when I write a long story about my adventures in adulthood that someone else might actually be reading it. That is the vain part of me, the other part of me that likes to talk knows that I'd still do it even if no one visited. My news links do kick ass though and I want to re-recommend them. It is like I pick the coolest "did you know" news and put it right along side my blog.





I had a discussion a while back with my sister Ana about hotel rooms. I love hotel rooms. Maybe because when I was little it was such a rare luxury to ever get to stay in one. I really do have trouble thinking of times I did stay in one, but I know it was La Quinta. So even now, I just like the idea of staying in a place that isn't mine and has cable. (I used to not have cable growing up.) I don't even have high standards, but I remembered how much I loved getting breakfast when I would go on business trips, or waking up to hot vegas sun shining in the window knowing that only fun was awaiting. Even the crashing after a long day at a theme park or the beach. The novelty has not worn off for me yet.






There are certain things I have to accept and one of them is how much fear motivates me. Well that might not be the right use of the word, maybe it is paralyzes me and keeps me from finding the motivation that I want. It affects so many of my decisions and non-decisions I make each minute, hour and day. The worst part is I don't even notice or realize it unless I take this kind of time to really take inventory of my thoughts and feelings. It has to be the fear of failure, the fear of rejection, the fear of doing something that will lead to unhappiness. I know the whole, if you focus on things you don't want instead of things you do want then you never get anywhere but things you don't want. It is hard for me to think of things I want as opposed to what I don't want because I know SO SO much about what I don't want.


I'm starting really apply for a lot more jobs, so fear not. Wednesday I went out to happy hour with Danny and Oscar. We met up with a lot of Danny's co-workers. Maybe this is a luxury I should put off for later, but I do like this part of the day.

once you cross the line it ceases to exist