Inspired

"It is easier to get forgiveness than permission." - Stuart's Law of Retroaction

Two people in my class ran the marathon this weekend. Very impressive. Running is good, I wish I could have it in me to one one. It is still one of my lifetime goals, just need to wait until I want it bad enough to do it. I have a new mouse that I think is awesome, but I have yet to really use it. Its relevant.

I am a sucker for TV and getting lost in a series I haven't seen too much before. So this weekend, I watched most of My Name is Earl and The Office. They are both great shows. I don't recommend trying to watch them all in the same day as I have done, but that is just how I tend to do things. I've also rediscovered Scrubs, I'm glad they are starting to syndicated it. I heard today at school that people don't have time for TV. That worries me, maybe I shouldnt' have time for TV, I don't know, I make time I guess.

I was talking to a friend this weekend about cancer. I don't use that word often and it feels a bit weird to say, maybe because I am not used to it. Cancer affects a lot of people, but I have not yet had a person close to me affected (not completely true I must note). I have dealt with other things, but not this. I don't know too much about the details, but I know that I have no idea the type of courage it would take to deal with it. I hate the fact that anyone should have to deal with it, but what I admire most is when people have a positive outlook. There are people that bring you down and those that inspire you, she is the latter. I hope she beats it and hope that the process is something that isn't too bad. It has really got me thinking about the topic and other related issues.

I made SilverStar this weekend. It means nothing to you and honestly doesn't mean much, but to me it means that I invested a lot of time playing, so I'm proud of the news. I have been studying Limit Holdem recently. I have read two books on the subject and invested some time playing. Here is the problem, I am learning, but I am not yet very good at it. I can play for 2-3 hours and just break even. That is good, but the whole point is to be winning. Here is my problem. Limit, NL cash and NL tournament are all very different games. NL cash and tourney are more similar, but limit is a whole other creature. So most of my experience in the past few years has been NL tourney. Changing to Limit has been like starting a whole new game. I don't have enough experience yet to draw upon. There is overlap, and that has helped somewhat. So I'm in a spot. I haven't been playing NL recently so I'm worried my skills are getting weaker since I'm not getting experience. So what should I do? Should I keep focusing on limit, or because I'm bored of limit, just change back to NL and start up there again. I feel like I left NL while I was getting pretty decent at it, and now I'm doing the same with limit. Doing both isn't very easy because your mind likes to focus on one thing. It is hard to think, well in NL I'd play this hand this way and in limit I'd play it this way. I'm not that good. I'm still trying to figure out how to play it in each. So then we get to NL, I don't know which game there to focus on. 9 person sit and gos, 180 person tournaments, rebuy tournaments or just satellites. I try to keep a good mix, but I really just want to be good at one thing, do well at it and then move on. I keep trying new things before I get good at any one of them. This is resembles my life in many ways. For now I'll just keep playing poker trying to keep my bankroll in tack.

So I have been having problems with insomnia this past week. I feel like I have had them most of my life. It is my fault I have insomnia, so it isn't an excuse. Its a two fold problem, one is that I can't sleep, go to bed late, then wake up late, so I'm not tired the next night at bed time. So it just keeps getting worse and worse. The second part is the racing thoughts, the worries of homework, school, finances, and other random things that run through my mind. (static). So as far as solutions go, you have sleeping pills to hopefully get back on a normal clock. I really don't like them. I have nytol (and Nyquil), but the problem is that the next morning you still feel sleepy and dragging. It never feels like good sleep. So I don't take them often. Then you have persciption drugs, but I try not to take that when I don't have to, and it also has that morning dragging feeling. So there is a 3rd option, its an herbal supplement of melatonin and vitamin B6. It doesn't make you too sleepy, but it does help you sleep and you don't drag in the morning. I have a feeling that probably doesn't work and its just the placebo effect that makes it work, but I'll take that. Well I had run out of the herbal one, but I bought a box last night, and took one pill thinking it wouldn't make much of a difference. Well it did help me get to bed. I woke up this morning at 6am and stayed in bed until 10am, so I'm sure I got a lot of sleep. This has been a life long issue that I need to beat once and for all.

I'm here in this city for a reason, I wish it was more clear to me