Things are not going so well. I missed class on Tuesday. I then missed work on Wednesday. I had taken some medicine on Tuesday that gave me the most horrible headache. It was the worst I've ever had. I went to bed with it and woke up with the same headache. I had to call into work and say I'd go in on Friday instead. Maybe it’s a combination of feeling physically miserable and emotionally miserable…but the emotional is why I missed school and physical is why I missed work. Hopefully I'll get things together soon.
Some people never learn and I am one of them. Every year spring comes and its beautiful outside and I’m smart enough to know that I need to stay clear due to my allergies. Well last year, and this year, I took Koki and Mia out for a walk for a while to enjoy the weather making sure to not be outside long enough for it to really give me a bad reaction. What I forget is that while my cats are outside, they are rolling on the ground and covering their fur in pollen. They become pollen bombs that sleep on top of me and I wonder why for the next week I’m going insane with red eyes and terrible allergies. It is almost kind of funny how dumb I can be.
Speaking of never learning. I threw my remote in the trash can. It's always somewhere on my bed and at times falls in the trash can right by my bed. I usually check for it, but this time I didn't check there and threw out my trash. Genius. What can ya do?
Today I decided to attend a full day of classes so that I could have full attendance and feel like I’m back. It is hard to explain how nervous and stress I feel when I haven’t attended in some time. I feel like people will know, like I’ll be told that I can’t graduate or get in trouble….or much worse be called on. Its like a spiral of shame….procrastinators would understand. I went to my first class and it felt great. Plus we have all of next week off so that is grand. Then my second class wasn’t too bad and I felt good about that too. My last two I was worried about. I tried to read for my next class and try as I did I could not concentrate or understand the topics, so I decided I’d show up and just sign in as unprepared, which I really don’t mind. Then I went to my last class. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be work wise, but because it is so hot today, the class was hot. I was boiling and bored out of my mind. I didn't know what to do to keep my mind busy. I did a very simple thing, attended my classes, but for me it was a moral victory I really needed.
I need a job. Pretty much the plans for the next part of my life are dependent upon what job I find and where it is located. I'm looking in the Valley, DC, SA and maybe Austin. The point is I should really pick up on the looking and really try. I don't want a competitive job where I'll have no chance due to my less than stellar grades, but a good starter job where I can prove myself and work up. Not knowing where to move all my stuff is the most stressful part. For now it's all going to Edinburg.
I found out from Maria's site that she is done with Chemo. What she went through I'll never understand, but I'm impressed with how she handled it. I hope she ends up being Cancer free and never has to deal with it again.
As far as I understand, Jorge is going to next year be in his first year of being an intern. The way I have people explain it to me is in Grey's Anatomy terms. He got accepted to Tuffs in Boston, so he will do a year in NYC and then go to Tuffs for 4 years and then I think he can start making the big bucks. Man the dedication it takes to be a doctor is unreal.
Juan is waiting to hear from medical schools and I hope he gets into many. He has worked so hard toward his dream and will be a doctor, but it would be nice if he could get started soon.
I haven't gone out drinking in a long time. I need to get drunk soon. Nothing like a good night of drinking to forget about everything. Too bad the morning just adds a new problem, the hangover.
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